Time Flies When You're Having Fun!

Hang through this friends....it's going somewhere.  Last night Bella Kate (who is 3) and I were playing on the deck waiting for Dan to get home.  She got in her Little Tikes Coupe and said, "I'm going to school Mom, see ya later!"  I laughed as she "locked" her door and put on her imaginary seat belt.  "Tell me to be careful!" She cried like I was totally neglecting my motherly duties.  I told her to be careful and have fun.  Off she went to the other end of the deck.  She got out and "played at school" for a few minutes then hopped back in and Flinstoned it back to me.  "I'm home!" (I hope she is always this enthusiastic to get home) "How was school?" I asked her.  "Oh, it was fine." with this very grown up voice. Suddenly, flashing before my eyes was a 16 year old girl pulling into the drive way, telling me school was fine that day.  Ugh.  While I have hopes and dreams for my kids to grow up to be independent, go to college, get married, and have a family of their own, the reality of how quickly that will actually happen sometimes becomes very clear.  She will not be under our authority for that long.  I need to be busy and purposeful with the time I have to guide her and teach her.
It seems that not that long ago every event that I longed for took fooorrreeevvverrrrr to get here.  I didn't get it when grown ups said, "When you're older, time flies."  And while I believe the Bible is true and accurate I didn't get it in James when it says "...you are a mist that appears for a little time and then vanishes.."  Really? 70 years seems like a really really long time when I just can't wait for (insert Christmas, graduation, wedding, baby, etc).  But in the grand scheme of thousands of years of history on Earth and then go ahead and throw in eternity, 70 years is truly a mist.  While I do need to stay on it for the 20ish years I have to train up my kiddos, what about staying purposeful for my God?
I told you you're going to have to stick with me.  This is supposed to be about adoption, right?  Adopting internationally has brought on a lot more criticism, from strangers and family, both directly and indirectly, than I expected it to.  Recently said of me, "She doesn't know what she's getting herself into." and how "You're not doing your girls any favors." At first, comments like this would make my skin want to melt off from the blood boiling underneath.  But now I'm just letting them know they need to take it up with God, because their problem is really with His command and His word, not with me.  The one that makes me laugh the most is, "You really want more kids after this?  I mean in this economy that's (insert ridiculous, crazy, brave(but not in a good way))."  They usually follow up with, "yeah, we might do that someday."  Now before I go on, there is a time to do things, and I'm not discounting that, 2 years ago would not have been the time for us to adopt.  BUT why are we waiting?  We are adopting for a lot of reasons, but at the core of it is Jesus changed our lives by adopting us and God's word says to care for orphans.  We have 70 years (give or take on average) to do what God has commanded us to do.   I don't just mean adoption.  I don't think adopting is a command, but caring for orphans is.  There are lots of ways to do that.  But either we believe what the Bible says or we don't.  We make the dangerous assumption (especially in the part of the country that I live in) that just because you recognize that Jesus is the Son of God you assume that you have a relationship with Him and are forgiven.  Even demons in the New Testament would call Jesus out on who He is, and they were afraid because the knew the authority He had.  They recognized who He is, but they certainly will not spend eternity with Him in heaven.  So we believe in God? James says even demons believe in God and shudder.  It takes us recognizing that we are separated from God, we have messed up, and need to not only recognize who Jesus is and what He did for us on the cross but recognize we need forgiveness and get that by grace through faith.  Then if that's true for us we need to get busy.  There will never be a perfect time to share the gospel, adopt an orphan, go on a mission trip, live overseas.  Satan will always provide you an excuse.  But if we believe what the Bible says, our life has changed because of Jesus Christ.  If our life has really changed, don't we want others lives to change too?  There are places so desperate for the gospel.  They can't wait until we are retired and our kids are in college to hear.  A couple generations will be gone by then.
When I was in Ghana working at a hospital I was overwhelmed by physical death.  Babies, kids, young adults, every day dying.  It took me months of being home to shake some of the the things I had seen.  But I'm surrounded by spiritual death constantly and I don't blink an eye.  So while my time is flying, what am I going to do with it?  Because soon I'll vanish.
Thanks for hanging through this my bloggy friends.  This isn't for you, it's for me.  Now I need to get off here and get busy!

Quiet Time Thoughts & The American Dream

      So this has been an interesting week.  Monday started off incredibly well with USCIS being so kind as to fingerprint us a month early!  Later that day I had an extremely flat tire (a big thanks to the three men who changed it in the rain and to my awesome husband who used his lunch to get a new tire for me).  The rest of the week has had ups and downs, not only with adoption stuff but with all things being considered as we look to what the next couple years hold for the Jenkins family.  I then ended the week with a fender bender that was completely my fault and thankfully did more damage to me than the other guy.  A lot is about to change and while I’m sooo thrilled, I’m overwhelmed at times.  So this afternoon I took advantage of the girls nap to sit and be still.  Be still and pray and read.  I thought about our journey so far and how far we have to go.  I also thought about all the encouragement I’ve received and the not so encouraging conversations.  And what it really comes down to is it’s not about me.  It’s not about me or my inconveniences or emotions.  It’s about Jesus and if I’m really trusting Him.  We started this journey because we love being parents and want more children.  We started because God loves orphans and clearly tells us to care for them.  And even more than that because as my sweet Bella Kate sings “I once was lost and now I’m found”.  One of the more memorable comments I’ve received about adopting is “So, if you go over there and they aren’t what you want or something is wrong with them, can you pick different ones?”  We are not picking out a puppy or buying a car.  We are having two children, whatever that means and comes with, they will be ours and we will take care of them just like we do our girls.  AND praise God that He does not have that attitude about His children.  Because I am not worthy and do not deserve to be adopted by Him.  What I deserve is Hell (the Bible says all have sinned and fallen short of the glory of God and that the wages of sin is death).  But God took me, the one who messes up (a lot, just ask my husband) and by His grace saved me through the death and resurrection of Jesus (The Bible gives hope when it says “If you confess with your mouth Jesus is Lord and believe in your heart God raised Him from the dead, you will be saved).  Thank you Lord, for not looking at me and saying she has too many things wrong with her and will be disobedient and has had too much of a past, leave her as an orphan.  Instead, He loved me and adopted me and changed my life forever. 

            Another favorite comment of mine is “wouldn’t you rather give your two kids more in life than giving four just a little?”  Okay folks, let’s get honest.  Apparently this person is, because even if I thought it I can’t imagine saying it aloud and I’m a little nauseous that that is the American mindset.  I have a love/hate relationship with the book Radical by David Platt.  I love it because it’s true and I agree with what he has to say.  I hate it because I’m living the American Dream.  He talks about taking the Jesus of the Bible and turning Him into a comfortable American middle class Jesus.  And that is what came to my mind when someone made that comment to me.  We’ve made Him a Jesus who says “Sure, leave those kids as orphans to starve or die of preventable disease so that you can take your kids to Disney every year until they graduate high school”.  It’s absurd.  The Jesus of the Bible says to care for orphans; there is no contingency in there about what that means for the sacrifices we have to make in order to do that.  I’m not denying that the budget is going to be a little tighter with two more kids and we’ll have to make some sacrifices.  But everyone in the Jenkins family will be clothed, well fed, warm, and live in our comfortable suburban home.  Yes they will have to share a room (which they’ll love) and will have a few less toys (they won’t notice!) but will have more than enough!   As a note, I’ve taken 2 huge totes of toys from our house and sold them.   The girls have not noticed and my living room is still cluttered with play things  They won’t go to Disney every year but will go on some fun family vacays to be certain.  What we “need” and “want” are two very different things.  Even in my soon to be large-family, we will have way more than our needs met.  And I’m completely okay with the girls having a few less things.  Even after adding two more kids, we will just live a more modest middle class American Dream.  My point is, we still aren’t being very radical.

            For dinner tonight the girls and I had mac & cheese and green beans.  It’s not a bad dinner.  A dinner on a budget.  Since Dan is at work it was also quick and easy.  But I was feeling kinda sorry for myself, because I like to eat. Then I got a text from a sweet friend who is also adopting from Ethiopia .  She says, “You know you’re in the process of international adoption when you are eating tuna, grapes, and kool-aid for dinner!” Hilarious I thought and I told her what we had.  And immediately I thought, that’s more than our sweet African kids had today. 

            So you might want to keep praying that we get our referral soon, so I’ll have something to blog about besides my quiet time thoughts J